get away to get to myself

I am too rational, I think too much,...I want to get drunk more then I am, to be able to say things I have not said before. I want some one to know how I feel. I never been so sure and unsure at one time in my life. I am more sure now. I feel that I have a base that is not an illusion. I believe that every single moment can bring a crucial change.. so why wouldn't I change my future life for this love?